Christ, The Perfect Gentleman

Have you ever felt frustrated that God doesn’t just tell you what to do? Why isn’t God more direct? The answer is that He is supremely gentle.

There are many strong-willed people in our lives. They insist and pressure us into adapting to their hopes and dreams. For Americans, it might actually be considered a virtue to be assertive and not take “no” for an answer. We can feel manipulated and pushed around by those who demand submission. Eventually, we push back, insisting on having our opinions heard and our feelings appreciated. We want to be treated with respect as a fellow person, not as a means to an end. Thank God Jesus is not like that.

Our Lord is so very respectful of our free will that He invites us to participate with His plans. God would certainly have the right, the authority, and the power to force our compliance, yet He patiently waits for our response. Christ the Bridegroom asks for our heart; He never takes it. God could click His fingers and make us pawns that obey His law, like planets rotating around the Sun. Instead, Our Beloved merely whispers His desires and allows us to freely choose to love Him in return or to carry on without Him. As a perfect gentleman, Christ never dominates us but always protects our freedom. After all, love cannot be forced or bought:

“Were one to offer all the wealth of his house for love, he would be utterly despised” (Song of Songs 8:7b).

Even God’s word must be gentle, as is affirmed by the great prophet: It was in the gentle breeze that Elijah heard the voice of God. (1 King 19:12)

In the liturgy, we imitate the gentleness of God when we receive Holy Communion. We either present our tongues or our hands, but we never take the Body. We allow the Eucharist to be given freely, not snatched as by a thief. In the same way, men and women are called to gently offer, not demand, the love from their spouses. Marriage as a Sacrament reflects and reveals the love of the Divine Lover. Christ the Bridegroom offers and requests love freely, without coercions or threat. This is because of His great love and respect for us, His bride. This is why Jesus is the example and model of the perfect Gentleman.

Fr. Michael Stalla, Copyright 2025